Diary of the Dead (2007)

Dear Mr Romero,

I am one of your biggest fans. I have seen every one of your films, even Bruiser.  You and I have shared a long relationship as filmmaker and film viewer.  Hell, I helped build a site (yes, this site) because of your films.

As a child, you scared me with Night of the Living Dead.  This was no small task as I thought black and white movies were typically lame.

In Junior High, I was introduced to Dawn of the Dead.  I sat, mesmerized, viewing a horror masterpiece through the grain of an overly-rented VHS tape.  It set the bar in my mind for all zombie films.  Each layer of the movie resonated with me.  I was hooked.

Not long after, I rented Day of the Dead.  While others may have found it too "talky", I enjoyed every bit of it.  I felt like we understood each other, you and I.  You were leading to a fantastically gruesome crescendo and I was right there with you.

Fast forward almost 20 years later, I was one of those geeks waiting in line on day one to see Land of the Dead.  Some people said it was a let down.  They said it wasn't scary enough.  Blah.  I enjoyed every bit of it.  It was good to have you home again.

Now comes Diary of the Dead and I have to ask, did I do something wrong?  What did I do to deserve this?  I understand you wanted to do something different but this is just terrible.

Where once you trusted me with subtle social commentary, you feel compelled to beat me over the head with an already obvious and flawed message.

And, hey, I liked The Blair Witch Project too but you mean to tell me a filmmaker wouldn't put the camera down to help his friends?  And honestly, just between you and me, do you really think one of Jason's cast members or girlfriend wouldn't get fed up and beat him over the head with that camera?

Ok.  and I have to ask, how many tapes, batteries and additional hard drives did they bring to the student film shoot?   It seemed a little Gilligan's Island to me.

I could go on (cheap CGI gore, lack of plot, uncomfortable voice over dialog), but it won't do any good.  It's obvious we don't see eye to eye anymore and I think you have some explaining to do.

Sincerely,

Hugazombie.